When I was sixteen, my family decided to go on a trip deep into the mountains. All of us had a really good time while being enveloped in the arms of huge mountains, surrounded by clouds, and amazed by the natural beauty of this world. While on our way back, a terrible car accident happened, although no one was injured seriously, I wasn’t so fortunate.
The windshield of the car cracked into pieces, and as I was sitting in the front seat of the car, a few of the glass pieces struck my face. It was not a scene that one can forget easily; small pieces of glass were stuck all over the face.
Pulling out the shards wasn’t as painful as I expected, it just stung a bit. The real damage was still yet to come as I looked myself in the mirror, my complete face was scarred, it was a horrible sight. All that was going through my mind was, will I ever be alright?
I visited the doctor the next day and was assured that the scars would be gone, but it will take a year. Completely horrified by the fact that I still have to wait a long time and go to my school in this condition.
“Shame around self-damage can make it much harder for the individuals who are battling”
While in school, no one made fun of me directly at my face, but still, I could see it in their eyes that they wanted to be away from me. It was around this time I developed a tendency of inflicting pain upon myself and doing self-harm. I never thought that I would ever enjoy doing these things or indulge myself in the act of self-harm. But this is a common misconception that surrounds self-harm.
I didn’t want to turn into an attention-seeking person, hence no one knew about my self-harm for a long time. Hiding this fact made me feel ashamed and guilty as the days passed that I was harming myself and using it as a coping mechanism.
For other people, self-damage may be a method of imparting the pain which they are feeling. For somebody to go to harming themselves as a method of adapting to how they’re feeling, this is far beyond needing consideration, and this shame around self-damage can make it much harder for the individuals who are battling.
“Always remember things will eventually be alright, just learn to accept yourself”
When I go back and think about what made me stop and how I was able to cope with myself. I realized that it was a mix of understanding my thoughts, getting to know myself in a better way, and finding distractions to divert my attention from these thoughts.
It’s okay for others to not understand completely how to help someone in the case of self-harm. But one should always remember that it’s a dark and lonely place for anyone who is going through this. Still just knowing the fact that there is someone there for them whenever they need, it can provide them with the courage and support they need.
I’m writing this story while hoping that it will help someone in need and make them realize that they are not alone. It’s okay to struggle, but always remember things will eventually be alright, just learn to accept yourself.
